The whole point of this 'project' that we are undertaking is to get healthy. I'm looking at this as a chance to get healthy from a lot of different perspectives: physical, emotional, financial, and even occupational. I've taken steps lately in most of these areas (although buying a new car certainly did not count toward financial health), and I have to say that I'm really excited about what the future is going to hold for me--and for us!
We started Weight Watchers together this week, and I will admit that I did a terrible job until Friday. I've been feeling strange lately, and I don't know how to really explain it, other than to say that I haven't been myself. I just haven't felt good about myself, and that really colors your outlook on life. I am about 4 pounds shy of my highest weight, and I just can't face going back to that number. I've been feeling so poorly about myself that I just haven't had any motivation to do much of anything but eat. Being down in the dumps for the last couple of weeks certainly hasn't helped do me any favors.
But then something clicked. I woke up one day and realized that things were starting to come together. I have a brand new job that I know I'm going to love, I'm going to work with people I can't wait to meet, and my finances are starting to look up (thank goodness for that raise!). I had some time alone this week to reflect on what has been bothering me, and I pinned it all on feeling terrible about myself. Then I realized that there's no reason for it. At the risk of sounding arrogant, it occurred to me that I'm actually a pretty great person, all things considered, and that, by God, I am worth the effort to feel better! Then I got my hair cut on Thursday evening and had a heart-to-heart with my stylist, who has just lost 62 pounds herself. Her perspective was so inspiring, and I couldn't help but get motivated all over again.
So, here I am. I'm on Day 2 of Weight Watchers, and it's just like it has been all the other times I've done it. The first few days are the worst because I'm eating a lot less, and I'm eating differently. My head aches, but I know that it's finite. Very soon, I'm going to be used to this again, and the headaches will go away. I'm drinking a lot more water than normal, which I needed to do anyway! And this time, I'm not looking at it as a diet. This time, it's a lifestyle change. This could be where I've gone wrong in the past. Only time will tell.
I feel amazing right now! I've stuck with this for two days so far, and the beginning is always the hardest for me. B and I went out to dinner tonight, and I had a Santa Fe Chicken Salad at RubyTuesday's. That salad would ordinarily be 16 points!! I didn't eat the avocado, wonton crisps, most of the cheese, and most of the ranch dressing, so I'm hoping I knocked maybe 4 points off of it. Even if I didn't, let's do this math real quick. When we go there, I usually have the Smokehouse Burger and fries. At 1461 calories, 97 grams of fat (!!), and 7 grams of fiber, that burger alone would have been 37 points. Add the fries, and my typical dinner there is 46 points. So tonight, I got out of there at no more than 16. That, my dear friend, is a victory!
As for the coming week, I have two goals. One, since I'm traveling 4 days this week, is to make healthier food choices while I'm on the road. I'm debating taking some oatmeal and energy bars with me, but I haven't made up my mind yet. Two, I want to start working toward the 300 minutes of cardio I need to get in every week, according to my trainer. I'm going to aim for 3 30-minute cardio workouts this week. That's only 30% of my goal, but it's better than 0%. The exercise is what's going to be hardest for me.
I'm so glad we're on this path together. I feel like we'll be able to motivate each other, pick each other up when we're down, and be there to make sure that we both succeed. I can't think of a better friend to do this with, and I'm excited for both of us!
M
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